Bye, bye plastic bag. Hello, gorgeous!

This blogging thing is really working out.

Look at this delicious and super-glorious bag, handmade just for me by Ashley of Dogged Knits:

Oh, I own this bag. It's mine. Can you believe it?

It's got the perfect innards -- pretty blue and perfect pockets. (Pretty Blue and Perfect Pockets are best-sellers in my line of dolls for young girls. They're adorable.) This is some serious quality, dudes. Ashley is not kidding around.

And it's soft and beautiful and look at that fabric!

The best part? It was part of a swap! She asked if I'd make her a card like this one, and she offered to make me something in return.

I'd never done a swap before, and I didn't want to blow it by sending one little card in exchange for one big bag. Since it was impossible to find a currency conversion chart for handmade cards to handmade bags, we just did our best. I made her a little handful of cards featuring pigeons, and she made me the bag to replace this foolishness.

So here's the audience participation portion of this post:

At one point Ashley suggested that my Pidge for All Seasons card collection (Get Well, Congratulations, Happy Birthday, and blank inside pidge) might be reason enough to start an Etsy shop. For those with Etsy experience, what say you about this? For those of you who would buy something from Etsy, what do you think? If I started an Etsy shop, which of my things would people be interested in buying? Handmade cards? Embroidered items? Sewn things? Anything?

Discuss.

Also? Please give Ashley her well-deserved props! I lovelovelove my bag!

Getting into and out of the groove: Part II

So. The groove. Isn't it the best feeling when you're in it? And doesn't it both suck and blow when you're out of it? Damn that groove.

Anyway, as I was saying, it had been a while since I last stamped. Usually a social activity for me, stamping almost always happens with B-SNAK and our other very good friend who I'll just call Ms. Refusing to Watch American Idol Even Though LaKisha Jones May Very Well Be The Most Amazing Woman Anyone Has Ever Seen In The History of Ever, Because Ms. Refusing Already Has Too Many Shows She's Watching, Esquire. Too long for a nickname? How about Not Watching American Idol? NWAI. That's better.

Ok. So, the three of us have been stamping together for years now. We get together, play awesome music, crack wise, make cards, and laugh a great deal. We also threaten to punch one another in the face a lot. It's usually in this context:

NWAI (to me): Did you see what B-SNAK just made?
Me: No.
B-SNAK: Look!! (holds up a ridiculously intricate and beautiful card that she made in about two seconds)
Me (to NWAI): What a little bitch.
NWAI: I'm gonna punch her in the face.
Me: She knows what she did.

Oh, to be clear: any one of us can be the little bitch in the above scenario. It's just usually B-SNAK, because she's a card-making machine.

This day was no different. It was B-SNAK's birthday, and she was on fire.

Usually, she'll look through magazines or books for ideas, and she'll limit the supplies she's using. Lately, she's been using items from kits (she's a member of an evil monthly stamp club). But, she was already five steps ahead of the game on Friday. Believe me, it was "B-SNAK is a little bitch"-this and "You know what you did"-that all morning. NWAI just jumped right in, too, like she hadn't missed a beat, and she finished 12 cards in about 5 minutes. Right back into the groove!

Me? Yes, well. You won't be surprised that my snail's pace isn't limited to just knitting and sewing. As the tornado of productivity whirled around me, I slowly made my way through my supplies, testing things out. I calibrated my expectation machine, ensuring everything was properly low. But I stayed strong. And positive.

So you can imagine that I was thrilled when I created this combination of stamps and inks:


My inside voice: Thank God I can still figure out how to put things together.
My outside voice: Who's a little bitch, now?


Woo hoo! This pleased me greatly. B-SNAK has taught me many things, and one of them is when you create a good card, make multiples. I made 10 of these. (Most of them aren't as wonky as the one on top appears.) So! Happy! The dust, the agony... all worth it!

I'll save you some legwork. Here are the specs for those cards:

Stamps: Impress - large circle of dots, thank you dot
Inks: Versamagic - Jumbo Java, Pink Petunia
Papers: Bazzill - Parakeet, Chocolate; Stampin' Up - Ultrasmooth Vanilla


In the spirit of adventurousness I tried two other things in the afternoon, and was underwhelmed. They're fine. Not terrible. Fine.

(1)

Stamps: Leavenworth Jackson - dude in hat and coat, clouds; Zettiology - tree in background; unknown company - tree stamp to represent "grass"
Inks: Versamagic - Jumbo Java; Versamark - for watermark images of clouds, "grass", and tree in background (on cream-colored part)
Paper: Fabriano card (see photo of box below)
Ephemera: little cardboard Scrabble tiles, individually cut out with little scissors and adhered with Diamond Glaze


(2)
Stamps: Zettiology - tree branch with bird; Impress - happy birthday
Inks: Versamagic - Jumbo Java, Red Brick, Aegean Blue (applied to stamp with Stampin' Up blender pen)
Paper: Fabriano card

As an aside, I heart Fabriano cards. But they are so expensive, it's ridiculous. Paper shouldn't be that expensive. Talk about some bitches.


In the third and final installment of "...the Groove", I shall regale you with the story of NWAI's and my car ride to and from B-SNAK's house. It'll kinda be like a buddy/road picture, only shorter. And without the moving pictures part. But, I assure you, there'll be just as much cursing and sass!

("Cursing and Sass" appears courtesy of Cursing and Sass, attorneys-at-law, specializing in personal injury and intellectual property.)

Getting into and out of the groove: Part I

It's been a while since my rubber stamps and inks have seen the light of day. A long, sad while. So when B-SNAK said she wanted to have a Stamping Day at her house for her birthday, I was really excited. Excited and -- if I'm honest -- a little nervous.

What if I've forgotten how to do it? What if all my inks have dried up? What if it's been so long since I've stamped that when I finally get them out, I become incapacitated with disgust because all my rubber stamps are of ducks dressed as doctors or pigs doing somersaults or something? Ugh. Why have I not done more stamping? Why have I squandered my resources?

(FYI: That little tour of my brain? Free of charge!)

It was B-SNAK's birthday. I had to push through that nonsense. I held my breath, didn't look too closely, and packed my supplies for the trip to her house.


Ok. So I looked closely. And with some judgement. But, look at those signs of neglect! What is my problem?

Hey, now that I think about it, this is similar to another experience I have sometimes. I don't know if you've ever had this, but when I haven't exercised in a while and then I start again, I find myself saying, "Why haven't I been working out?" But I'm saying it to myself while I'm working out! As I am doing a set of sit-ups I'm thinking this. Completely ridiculous. I am actively doing the thing I'm saying I want to be doing and simultaneously giving myself grief for not doing it. I am a genius. I'm half-tempted to do it about writing right now. And I'm writing!

I'll tell you all about Stamping Day and even show you the items that came out of it. But first, I want everyone to stop giving themselves grief (that includes me) and enjoy the rest of your day. Life's too short. Deal? Awesome.

Online stores of painfully cute proportions

Nora over at Black Dog Knits has my back. I mean, really. She made sure I didn't knit an overpriced baby coat, she redirected me to a delicious adult coat option instead, and then offered a coat-along to boot. Then. Then! She gave me not one, but TWO heads-up about online stores with crazy cute Japanese fabrics.

First, she alerted me that the unbelievably adorable Kitty Craft shop has re-opened. Great! I've been waiting and waiting for them to re-open! I promptly zipped on over there, only to find that many fabrics were sold out. I was very sad about this.

Then! Knowing I was sad about this development, she sent me a link to SuperBuzzy.

Now. Pay close attention here. (I'm particularly talking to you PIC, B-SNAK, SIL, and Mue.) Super. Buzzy. Has. Awesome. Shit.

Safety disclaimer/advice/aside #1: Go get your teeth protectors. Put them on. As much as I'd love to help, I can't really do anything from here if you bust your teeth from all the cuteness that you're about to behold. (Even if I were there, it's not like I'm a dentist or anything, so fat lot of good I'd do anyway.)

Aside #2: That safety disclaimer reminds me of a poster that my boyfriend in college had in his dorm room. He'd gotten it from his high school's nurse's office. It said, "Safety is a constant battle. You can never relax." This always cracked us up. You can never relax! Isn't that hilarious?

Ok. Enough with the asides. Everybody ready? I'm gonna give you some highlights. There are many, many more cute things. Go check them out after viewing this sampler.

(This is not meant to hurt you. It's only out of love. All love.)

Notions & Trims, bitches!

BEES???!! On cloth ribbons??


Yup. Now look at this little brown dog sniffing white flowers:


Don't like flowers, just like dogs? Well:


Love girls?



Ok. Now. The killer.

Sit down all over again. Are you re-sitting?

Lammies. A doggie. A little fellow with a cap and red pail. And a little saying.

"Wake up on the grass."

Wake up on the grass?! But, safety is a constant battle! I can never relax! Waking up on the grass doesn't seem safe. Can that be safe? Waking up on the grass implies you either (1) accidently or on purpose fell asleep on the grass/were relaxing or (2, and even worse) you fell asleep elsewhere but somehow ended up on the grass! "Wake up on the grass" could mean all kinds of things. None of them safe!

Well, while this doesn't seem like sage advice, it's a ridiculously cute piece of trim.

So! Stick any of these trims on a piece of cardstock, and you've got yourself a greeting card. Double it over, sew it up, and you've got yourself a bookmark. Or, add it to some fabric item, and you're rocking some serious flair. Trims!

Go into the world. Explore the glorious cuteness. And if you can find some way to both relax and be safe, I encourage you to do so at this time.

The cutest stamps you ever saw

Brace yourself, people.

Are you bracing?

I give you a rubber stamp from the genius that is The Small Object.

Check. Out. These. Stamp. Sets.

Yeah, boo hoo hoo is right.

(I'm getting ever-nearer to a completed heating pad cover, one flower at a time. Why must I make things so difficult?! WHY? I thank you for your continued patience and support.)

You used to be bi!

That's all she said to me, and I knew instantly what she meant.

I was hanging out with the WWNSMW (aka B-SNAK) last weekend, and at some point in the evening she looked at me with a twinkle in her eye and blurted out, "You used to be bi! I read your blog all the time, and it's always 'knitting this' and 'sewing that' and I don't even know what else because I don't understand ANY OF IT! WHERE'S THE STAMPING?!"

Did I ever mention I have a giant collection of rubber stamps? Oh. I think I did, once in passing.

Yes, well, B-SNAK and I have a long-standing relationship with stamping that I think you should know about. So: The Story of B-SNAK and the Stamps. (This will also be the title of the blockbuster sequel to Akeelah and the Bee that I'm gonna write. Betcha! I'm gonna do it next. Right after this.)

Taking it back to 1998 {oodly oodly oodly oodly}:

She's having a little get-together, she says. Do I want to come? I won't have to buy anything, but it could be fun if I like rubber stamping. I think to myself, "I do like rubber stamping! I have a stamp of some old-timey shoes, and a bowler hat, and a pocket watch. I could take those with me! And I won't have to buy anything!"

I won't have to buy anything, the first one's free, and trail mix is good for me.

These are ways of thinking that are so, so dangerous. Case in point (and I think this is important): the Trader Joe's Salty, Sweet & Nutty Trek Mix. "It's healthy! It's a Trek Mix! It's got nuts!" Sure. Nutty! Ok. What they mean by "Nutty" is "Peanut Brittle". The nuts are, in some good proportion, housed in rocks and rocks of sugary brittle. (It should tell you something when its form is rock. Nothing good ever comes in the form of rock, in my humble opinion. Not music, not cocaine, not an oversized diamond that makes everyone at least a little uncomfortable -- if not downright small -- when near it.)

Point is: I shoulda known.

I'll never forget the moment that that Stampin' Up demonstrator stamped a teddy bear onto some cardstock, stuck it onto another piece of cardstock, folded it up, and... "OOOOOH!" We were floored that she'd made a greeting card - just like that! "We're gonna save hundreds and hundreds of dollars never having to buy a birthday card again!" "This is the greatest thing we've ever seen!" "How can I do this too?!" Suckers, all.

Present day: Between me, B-SNAK, and another couple of very good friends with very serious problems, we have thousands of stamps. Thousands. That would be bad enough. But, what's worse are the Inks. Papers. Stickers. Postage stamps. Tags. Collage sheets. Brads. Scissors. Eyelets. Markers. Pencils. Watercolor pencils. Adhesives. Ribbons. Rub-ons. Sponges. I could go on. I really could.

I used to be bi. She's right. Now? I'm a polygamous crafter. Straight up. My stamping may've taken a back seat to knitting and quilting, but it'll be making a comeback here pretty soon. You'll see.

I did have to buy some stuff, some of it was free, and for the most part it's all been quite good for me. Being a polygamous crafter may stretch you thin. But that mutherfuckin' Trek Mix? Now, that shit'll kill you.