Just because I'm fickle doesn't mean I don't love you.

Dear Socks That Rock Yarn,

You are awesome. Let's just start there. Really, really awesome. You're vibrant and robust. You're wonderful to look at. You're a great set of balls. Really. Just look at you.

But after a few tries with you and the Chevron Scarf, I just couldn't make it work. Let's be clear. I do love you. That should not be in question. Just because you're not the right yarn for this scarf, doesn't mean you won't be right for something else. Don't take it personally. Seriously, don't.

You and I are not the only ones to have to rethink a relationship. I'm sure you've seen hundreds of blog posts wherein fickle and guilt-ridden knitbloggers apologize profusely for misleading their well-intentioned and talented yarn. Right?

Look, you are a yarn of noble character, and you're entitled to an explanation. Here's what happened. Yesterday, I accompanied my PIC to the yarn store with the stated purpose of finding yarns for her Chevron Scarf. (We're gonna make these scarves together like we did with the Clapper Project of '05.) Innocent enough.

My PIC was sitting on the floor in front of the cubby with the Colinette Jitterbug yarns, and I was squatting next to her. We held two yarns up together that we were considering, and we thought the combination looked good. As we were looking at them, a woman who works at the store came over, saw the combo, and pushed me she liked it so much.

You know how I'm always saying I want to shove someone and say "Get out!" when something is really great? Like Elaine on Seinfeld. When I imagine doing that, though, I always imagine the other person standing. Not squatting.

Yeah, well, this woman literally bent over and pushed me on my knee so I ended up on my ass she liked the yarns so much. Dudes, she pushed me, and I tumped over. In the middle of the store. Because the lady liked the yarn combination.

It's not a sales approach I'm familiar with, and I don't know what the liability ramifications of this kind of tactic might be, but I think it was effective. I think I got what she was going for.

These do look good together. I think you would agree that I would wear a scarf in these colors. I think.

I could be wrong. I'm willing to be wrong. These might knit up together and be terrible, drab crap. Certainly possible. But I have to give it a try. I have to. Because, seriously? I am not going to get knocked on my ass for nothing.

I trust you'll understand. (You are socks that rock, after all.)

With lots of love,
Dr. B.